Hello Dear Readers, 

Happy New Year and all the best for 2026!

Welcome back to the Motherhood series! This is where I reflect on my real-life journey as a new mother—from the very beginning all the way to 24 months of learning, growing, and loving my little ones. If you’re new here, don’t worry—you’ve got time to catch up. Start with Part 1 by clicking here: https://keemahg.com/dear-men-1/ and join me from the start. 

When a woman is with child, she steps into a season that is both sacred and vulnerable—one filled with change, uncertainty, and awe. Over the course of 40 weeks, her body shifts in ways she could never fully prepare for. Her hormones surge to support new life, and with that come physical, mental, and emotional changes that can feel overwhelming at times. Some women are fortunate to move through pregnancy with few symptoms, but most experience them in one way or another. No matter how it unfolds, this is a tender and fragile season that deserves care, grace, and understanding.

These are the moments when we need our men to truly show up—to step in without being asked and shoulder the responsibilities of the home. To respond with patience instead of frustration, with self-control instead of distance, especially when we’re overwhelmed. This is when support looks like rides to doctor’s appointments, steady encouragement, and unwavering presence. This is when we need our men to be our backbone as we carry, deliver, and nurture their children. It’s here that the fruit of the Spirit must be practiced daily, not occasionally. And this is the kind of support I wish I had known.

Unfortunately, majority of my experience didn’t resemble the support mentioned above and, at times, felt somewhat dramatic. After one exhausting night, it became clear to me that I had a choice: I could stay and absorb the emotional outbursts, or I could protect my peace with implementing some space. I’ve heard people say that when a woman becomes pregnant, the man does too—that he shares in the emotions and the changes. This is where I empathized, and did my best to demonstrate to compassion. But there were moments when all I wanted was to sit quietly with the miracle happening inside me, to honour the beauty of being entrusted with bringing life into the world without the drama. I wanted this season to be something I could look back on with positivity and softness, not another memory marked by disappointment tied to a man—once again.

The night after a horrible argument, my stomach began to contract, followed by a pain I had never felt before. I told myself it was just cramps, but the pain only intensified. I called my cousin, and moments later, we were rushing to the hospital—where I learned I was having contractions. The doctor explained that if they couldn’t stop them, I would have to be transferred to the Mega Hospital in Montreal to deliver my one-pound babies. My heart literally sank into my chest, and I prayed, doing my best to relax internally.

From that day forward, I promised myself that I wouldn’t take on any drama from anyone—not even my partner. Nothing was worth putting my pregnancy at risk, or jeopardizing my children’s health. Even my partner realized it simply wasn’t worth it, and my last trimester went much more smoothly than the ones before. 

What that day really taught me was to have more compassion for myself while I was pregnant. I know men go through their own emotions during pregnancy, and I don’t dismiss that—but it doesn’t compare to what we, as women, carry for forty long weeks. So yes, I can understand their feelings, but they should never take precedence over the woman carrying their child. This is the moment when boyfriends, husbands, or the fathers need to stand firm and lead, even when they’re scared, unsure, or overwhelmed. Leadership isn’t about having all the answers—it’s about having the courage to do what’s right, not just for the woman beside him, but for the life he helped create.

With love, Keemah G.